NP’s Family Dynamics with Eesher: My ungrateful husband betrayed me
In this week’s episode of NP’s Family Dynamics with Eesher, a heartbroken wife opens up about a husband who constantly belittles her and, worse, allegedly made advances toward her own sister. Now torn between silence and confrontation, she seeks advice on how to handle a crisis that could shatter her home and her family.
“Dear Sis Eesher
Please, how do I deal with a husband who doesn’t see the best in me? My husband complains about everything I do.
Secondly, my sister is living with us. We stay in a 3-bedroom apartment. She has her own room, and everything had been fine—until recently. My husband suddenly started complaining about her, even to the point of asking her to leave our house.
When I asked my sister what happened, she told me that my husband tried to take advantage of her, but she refused. My own blood sister, fa…
Read also: NP’s Family Dynamics with Eesher: Torn between gratitude and growth
Should I confront my husband, or should I just pretend I don’t know anything about his advances toward her? I don’t want my parents to find out about this…
Right now, I hate my husband. I don’t even want to see him.
Dear Anonymous,
First of all, I want you to know that your feelings are valid. It’s very painful to feel unappreciated in your own marriage and even more heartbreaking to deal with a betrayal of this kind.
Let’s take this one step at a time.
1. Your husband’s constant complaints: When someone constantly criticizes you, it can crush your self-esteem. If he never sees the good in you, that’s emotional abuse. You deserve to be treated with respect and appreciation. Try to have a calm conversation with him, and if he refuses to change, please consider seeking professional support or cocounsellingither as a couple or on your own.
2. The issue with your sister: This is serious. If your sister’s claim is true—and especially since she’s your blood—you need to believe her and protect her. A man who would try to take advantage of your own sister is not only disrespectful but dangerous. Please don’t ignore it. Pretending not to know won’t solve the problem—it will only make you more miserable.
You don’t have to involve your parents immediately, especially if you’re not ready. But don’t let fear of scandal silence you. What’s at stake here is your safety, your sister’s dignity, and your mental peace.
You don’t need to make a rushed decision, but please don’t stay silent either. Confront your husband calmly when you’re emotionally ready. Let him know that what he’s done is unacceptable. Above all, pray ardently for Allah’s intervention and guidance, and start planning how to protect yourself emotionally, financially, and physically because trust, once broken like this, is very hard to rebuild.
Take care of yourself. You are not alone.
With love,
Sis Eesher
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You should address the issue calmly as Aisha advised., when you are more emotionally ready with an elderly person that your husband respects.
Emotional Abuse isn’t a joke so you should do what is best for YOU.
Wish you peace in this phase of your life.
Ameen and thanks, Fareedah.